What Happens When You Love Better

A single moment can shift everything

There are conversations that leave a mark. Not because they are flashy or filled with buzzwords, but because they are true. That is exactly how I felt after sitting down with Sherry Richert Belul. Sherry is the founder of Simply Celebrate, a speaker, a coach, and the kind of person whose joy feels contagious. But what is even more powerful than her bright energy is the story behind it.

Before Sherry built a life around celebration, she came to a breaking point. She shared that she once felt so overwhelmed and lost that it was difficult to see a way forward. What changed everything was a meditation class, of all things. She walked into that room feeling like an iron wall was closing in around her. Her mind was filled with voices telling her she was not enough. That she could not. That she would never.

Then, something changed.

As she focused on her breath, she heard something different. A new voice. A kind voice. It simply said, "I don't want to die. I want to be here."

That single moment became the crack in the wall. The pinprick of light. And that has been her guiding force ever since.

Light does not need to be loud to be powerful

What Sherry teaches is that joy is not reserved for the lucky or the naturally bubbly. It is something we practice. It is something we build, one small moment at a time. When you hear her speak, you realize that celebration is not just about birthdays or big wins. It is about choosing to be here. It is about the decision to show up for your life, again and again.

That moment in meditation became the beginning of a new way of living. One that honors joy as sacred. One that sees light not as a destination, but as a decision.

And that is where the idea of "love better" begins to take shape.

Love is not passive

This was the core of our conversation. Sherry shared, "If I had to describe what I think makes our lives even worth living, it's love better." And she was not just talking about love in the romantic sense. She meant loving your people, your surroundings, your morning coffee, your garden. Yourself.

But here is the important part. It is not just a feeling. It is an action.

Loving better means doing something. It means saying what matters. It means being specific with your appreciation. It is sending the text after dinner. It is the love list — a simple, beautiful practice she teaches where you tell someone why you love them. Not just that you love them, but why.

And you do it while they are still here.

This approach changes everything because it shifts your focus from waiting for the right time to creating it.

Fashion, freedom, and the fight to feel alive

One of the most unexpectedly profound parts of our chat? Hats. Yes, really.

Sherry shared how choosing to wear a hat — something small and playful — became her declaration that she was choosing life. It was a visual cue that today mattered. That she was expressing herself fully. And honestly, I get it. For me, it was glitter nails. That small act of rebellion after corporate life. That little sparkle that said, "I am not going back."

We laughed about fashion, but underneath the laughter was a shared understanding. These choices are not about being trendy. They are about reclaiming joy. About finding ways to say, "This is who I am, and I am here."

Even if you are being asked to wear black to an event, you find a way to express your soul. (Feathers and tulle, anyone?)

Because joy can live in the details.

Planning for the end brings you back to the present

Toward the end of our talk, Sherry shared something powerful about her upcoming book, The Lovelist of a Lifetime. It is an end-of-life planner, but not the kind that makes you want to run. It is part practical, part emotional, and entirely loving.

The idea is this: planning how you want to be remembered, what you want to say, and how you want to leave your people is one of the most loving things you can do. Not someday. Now.

Most people avoid these conversations. But as Sherry puts it, when you face it with care and creativity, the fear fades. You remember that time is limited. And suddenly, what matters becomes much clearer.

Your choices begin to align with what you truly value.

Say it now

This is what I hope stays with you. Say the thing. Share the compliment. Write the love list. Wear the color. Be a little more you, and a little more alive, today.

Because when you love better, you do not just make others feel cherished. You become someone who lives fully, with intention.

So take a breath. Find your light. And follow it, one small act at a time.

That is how joy grows. That is how love works.

And that is how you build a life worth celebrating.

Chapters List

00:00 Introduction to Sherry Reichardt Ballou and Simply Celebrate

03:18 Sherry's Journey into Personal Growth and Coaching

05:59 The Power of Self-Expression and Colorful Living

08:37 Intentionality in Life Choices and Quality of Life

11:25 The Importance of Loving Better

14:01 Introducing 'The Lovelist of a Lifetime' Book

16:58 Navigating Mortality and End-of-Life Planning

19:19 Conclusion and How to Connect with Sherry

Full Transcript

Sherry R. Belul (00:00)

no matter how dark it is, Like one little bit of light changes everything. And that has been my guiding force.

Amanda Kaufman (00:25)

Well, hey, hey, and welcome back to the Amanda Kaufman show. And I am so excited about this episode. Thank you so much for being here because I have got Sherry Richert Belul here and she is the founder of Simply Celebrate. She helps people find creative, intentional and impactful ways to celebrate life and to express love for family and friends. She's a certified life coach and she supports people in living their best lives.

full of joy, success, engagement, and meaningful relationships. Now, dear listener, the selfish reason I am so excited about having Sherry here is because I knew all of that, because I have seen her at so many events over the years. We always find each other in the crowd, and it's just such a pleasure to have her here live on the show. So Sherry, welcome, welcome.

Sherry R. Belul (01:19)

Amanda, I love it. I love being with you and I love every time we find each other wherever it is in life. So, yay.

Amanda Kaufman (01:28)

It's so good. It's so good. Well, Sherry, I'm so curious actually about how you got into the world of personal growth and coaching and development. what? You're obviously extremely committed to it. And I and I love that about you. But I have always wondered what got you into it.

Sherry R. Belul (01:49)

Well, and I'm glad you asked that because the name of my company is Simply Celebrate. And the last thing I ever want anyone to think is like, that just comes naturally to that girl, right? To me, this all grew, the personal development, my work, everything I do.

really grew out of a very, very dark time for me. I was suicidal as a young woman and many years ago, but I still can tap into that pretty easily, like what that was like. And I was like many people, so fortunate to have been graced with teachers who came along exactly at the right time.

And so for me, this whole journey actually started with a meditation class that I was led to. And just quickly, because it's such a part of the work I do, which is I felt like this iron wall was closing in on me when I walked in. really like the voices in my head of not enough, not good enough, you shouldn't, you couldn't, you'll never. Were just killing me, literally.

You know how when you're meditating, you focus on the breath. And I actually, for the first time, heard a kind voice in my head that said, I don't want to die. I want to be here. And it was like a little pinprick of light in that iron wall. I could actually see it. no matter how dark it is, right? Like one little bit of light changes everything. And that has been my guiding force.

one little light at a time.

Amanda Kaufman (03:21)

And of course you are. mean, you know, to the listener who may be listening on the audio only version, you've got to see that you're showing up with her red glasses and lips just like I have today and fabulous hat that in every event that we've ever been to you like even when there's a uniform, you find a way to express, you find a way to like take your full

Sherry R. Belul (03:33)

I just like you to.

You

Amanda Kaufman (03:46)

you know, space and it's colorful and it's amazing. And you've really become a light for a lot of people that they look forward to seeing your name and seeing you out there. You know, how did you find it into this flame, this idea of like, you just need that little bit of a light, you know? Have you always been colorful or has that been like a choice? Tell me about this.

Sherry R. Belul (03:53)

Mmm.

Yeah,

no, it actually, think that it all sort of came together at the moment that I decided I was going to stay, right? So a lot of the reason also that I think I was so depressed was I was repressed, right? I grew up in a small town in Ohio. I didn't like really fit in with the political views. But I didn't know there was.

anything else really. Like there was just a certain way everybody wanted to be like each other and I wanted something else but I didn't know how to get it. And I think that the moment I decided to stay on the planet, which was a very conscious choice, I'd always wanted to wear hats. And I love the 20s, the 1920s. I can't believe now we're in the 20s. We're in an all new century of them.

Amanda Kaufman (04:52)

Round again.

Sherry R. Belul (04:53)

They came around again. But I love the 1920s, the flapper look. And I started to allow myself to express myself, even though it was really, really hard and uncomfortable as anyone knows who tries something new, a new part of ourselves.

Amanda Kaufman (05:10)

Yes, Sherry met me in my gray days. I've gotten more colorful over the years.

Sherry R. Belul (05:15)

was just gonna say, Amanda, it's one of the things that I, we've never had this conversation before, but I think silently we probably have. Like one of the things I've long admired about you and also Chris is that self-expression. And I see it and we get confidence from each other, don't we? Like, I mean, I feel like when I see the way that you, your glasses right now and your shirt and.

And so I wanted to be that part of the light too. I wanted to be, a hat to me is like, okay, today's the day, today's a party, today is something. And really trying to bring that spirit of could be my last, right, to every day.

Amanda Kaufman (06:00)

beautiful and very powerful, you know, the choices that we make about our expression every day and that meaning that it can have. And I think it's also so powerful what you just said about this choice to stay. I love asking people that I know are really well-rooted in the personal growth realm about their background and your story is 100 % yours.

And the thing I've noticed as a pattern is it so often like the brightest people, the happiest people, when you really dig into like, why are you so happy? You know, they've so often will share, well, it's because I know what it's like to really not be. Right. You know, and it is this beautiful and intentional choice that I just, whoever's listening to this.

just pick something brighter to wear or that is more joyful for you. You know, I'm actually about to go to an event. It's so funny because my friend is like very opposite in fashion. I didn't know we were going to talk about fashion today, but here we are. But she's amazing. She's a real blast, but she's all black, right? She's got like a very, you know, very black aesthetic and she's doing a book launch. So I'm going to go cheer her on.

Sherry R. Belul (07:07)

Right?

Amanda Kaufman (07:21)

And I'm reading the email, you know, with all the check-in details and everything that I'm going to do. And she has like really bold font. She's like, it is all black. And when I say black, mean, think monochromatic was the word. And she says, think Met Gala. You you can do whatever you want, but you cannot add any color. And I was like, so yeah, challenge accepted. All right, because there's definitely some tool involved, feathers.

You

I will not be repressed. But you know, it's it is that that that same thing of just like, hey, even if you are constrained in some way, you're not really it's like it's a matter of it's a matter of your creativity to find that expression somewhere.

Sherry R. Belul (08:05)

You know, Amanda, I love that so much. And we're talking about fashion, but we're actually talking about...

so much more, right? And I often tell people this. I mean, I love talking about clothes, even if people aren't really that interested in clothes, because it is a way that we discover who we are. If we choose to do it this way, I know there are plenty of other ways and people find all kinds of ways, but to me, clothing is such an interesting one because, well, I'll just tell you a quick story. One time my spiritual teacher had us label all the clothing in our closets.

Amanda Kaufman (08:11)

We really are.

Sherry R. Belul (08:37)

the depressed person wear? What does the enthusiastic person wear? What does the wannabe whatever person wear? And yeah, exactly. And it's fascinating because when we would go to pull that, for instance, like the sad girl clothes, you know, maybe for me, it would be like baggy pants and some sort of, you know, sweat shirt thing. That's just me.

Amanda Kaufman (08:42)

⁓ interesting.

What does the podcast interviewer wear? I see this. Yeah. Okay.

Sherry R. Belul (09:05)

the consciousness of what happens if I put the spirited person's clothing on, who do I become this day? And, you know, it's a beautiful active metaphor, right, for like part of your question about how do I practice joy. When I first started working at all those events where we got to know each other, I would put notes on the door, the hotel room door that said,

Be light, be love, because I needed a reminder a lot of times, because that wasn't always what I was showing up with, you know, initially. And I think clothing does that, right? It can do the same thing. I, you know, if I'm coming to see you, which I knew it would be such a wonderful thing to see you, I want to show up, because you do.

Amanda Kaufman (09:42)

That's powerful.

Yeah, yeah, I so appreciate that. And, when I very first became an entrepreneur, that was a violent act of asserting my freedom. The first thing I did really was get glitter on my nails. I don't actually have glitter on my nails right now, but for years I didn't go without glitter on my nails. And it was just like that that little act of defiance because I'd come out of a corporate setting where glitter would be like, what?

are you doing? You know, like, are you eight years old? You know, this is unprofessional and just like all those labels that I was just done with. And yeah, so so I love this. I love this. Now, I did want to make sure we also talked about quality of life. ⁓ And I know that that might seem like a bit of a segue. But

Sherry R. Belul (10:37)

Yeah.

Amanda Kaufman (10:43)

Here's what's coming into my brain is that our choices about what we wear, our choices about putting Post-its on the door and to remind ourselves of those very important things. It just really sounds like that intentionality around how you live your life is perhaps one of the most important things. Like, what would you say when it comes to your personal growth journey and also just coaching so many other people?

Sherry R. Belul (11:02)

Hmm.

Amanda Kaufman (11:09)

If maybe fashion's not the thing, what would you say is the thing that they should be paying attention to if they want to have a good quality of life and happier life?

Sherry R. Belul (11:15)

⁓ what

a great question. And you know what, Amanda, one of your recent guests, I forget, was it Lisa Smith who was talking? Yeah, was it? Okay. One of the things she said is my answer to your question, which is she used the phrase love better. I don't know if you recall that. There was a lot of great stuff in that conversation, but she used it.

Amanda Kaufman (11:25)

Mm-hmm.

It was a good episode.

Sherry R. Belul (11:39)

And love

better, I don't usually use that actually in those exact words, but if I had to describe what I think makes our lives, shall I say, even worth living, it's love better. And I mean, love ourselves better, love the people in our lives better, love our gardens, love our surroundings, love the books that we like.

But that is an action, right? It's not a passive thing to me. And that's where the intentionality is. It's like, I think that I'm constantly focused on, well, like this morning, you know, it's like, I had dinner with a friend last night and I wanted to make sure I sent the follow-up photograph of us and the, you know, things I loved about that time together, specific things to really anchor in for us. Like...

Amanda Kaufman (12:02)

Hmm.

Sherry R. Belul (12:28)

Like this is important, you know, we didn't just have dinner, you know, we're building our friendship, you know, brick by brick. That's right. And it's like that with ourselves. It's like that, like with our environment. And I loved when I heard that on your podcast because it just lit me up,

Amanda Kaufman (12:45)

Yeah, I love that. You know, there's this taking care, right? And just being a character, a character, you know, whether you're wearing the costume or not, but just like having that character of, of taking care and demonstrating that through our behaviors and I'm going to send the selfie and I'm going to have that next

connection with that friend like, you know, ideally I already know when I'm looking forward to seeing them again, you know, and I know that I used to really feel like it was so mysterious, you know, how some people could be so happy and have such high quality of life and when was it gonna happen for me? And the answer was exactly what you just said is I had to learn personally how to love better or how to just take more care.

Sherry R. Belul (13:10)

Yes.

Amanda Kaufman (13:33)

and not just trans, I used to think caring was like, I just care, like in my brain, you know, in my, in my view, I care, right? Or, or the fact that I'm having an emotional experience means I care. And it's like, yes. And how are you taking that energy or that, that emotional differential and translating that into an action of impact? Right.

Sherry R. Belul (13:39)

Right, right, right, Right.

so beautifully

said, right? Right. And you also pointed out something that I hope people caught, which was it's this and that and that and that, right? So it's like, it's not just a one time. I mean, to me, it starts with, this is a Kurt Vonnegut Jr. quote that I always mingle, but he says something to the effect of like, by all means, if you're having a good time and enjoying yourself and feeling happy, please say it out

Amanda Kaufman (14:01)

So good.

Sherry R. Belul (14:27)

Now that's not the exact quote, but it goes along something like that. And so to me, starts with, I'm with you and I'm gonna do it right now because this is the truth. I'm having such a great time being with you. This is amazing. Like I feel your energy. And I also can express to you, I felt your care in this whole process. It started before we got here together. And I hope that after we get off this podcast together,

we will have other ways that we're both connecting to tell each other like, wow, that was amazing. I'm so grateful for you, right? Yeah.

Amanda Kaufman (14:57)

Yeah, absolutely. Absolutely.

Like, just taking that care. my goodness. It does make you happier. I really believe that because you see the impact that it has on other people. Now thinking about taking care of things. I know you've got a new book coming around the corner and it's an interesting one. Do you want to just take a couple seconds and just share with us, you know, what are you working on? yeah, well, what is it? What are you working on?

Sherry R. Belul (15:24)

Well, and I would love to, and it's actually right on topic of what we're talking about. So it's a book called The Lovelist of a Lifetime, which is a double entendre because it's one of the cornerstones of my work is called a love list. And that's expressing things, say it now, say it to people, tell them why you love them. That's a love list. Be specific about why you love people. So that's a part of the book, but it's an end of life planner. And so it's also the most loving.

way we can care for people in our lives, no matter what age we are. Because a lot of people might tune out, they hear end of life planner and they think, oh, I'm 40, I'm 50, I'm 60, that's not for me. It's actually, believe it or not, something that we should all be doing.

at any time of our life. Because once we start to do the things, and the book is both logistical, you know, it's the healthcare directive, it's the wills, it's all the legal stuff, and leaving loveless for people, know, doing the storytelling so that people have those, you know, stories of your life. It's cleaning up relationships, it's getting clear on our spirituality, it's kind of the whole gamut.

To me, the reason this fits exactly, this is like the best way we can care for ourselves because you've heard Brendan talk about, know, mortality motivation, right? As soon as we remember this is finite and it goes by really fast, that's the moment we start to think, am I doing what matters? Am I saying what matters? Am I living what matters? ⁓

Amanda Kaufman (16:58)

Do what matters. Yeah, I've got a tattoo on

my arm. Seriously, I agree.

Sherry R. Belul (17:04)

of that, right? And so, you know, this is, you know, so it's partly for us, because it's like, it really helps us to to live what matters. And, you know, almost everybody has a horror story of someone that they love, who died, you know, it could be unexpectedly, and it could be, you know, even after an illness, who did not have things in order. And it puts this layer of

frustration and sometimes anger and hardship on top of grief. People, I really believe people should be able to just grieve.

Amanda Kaufman (17:39)

Yes, mean, what a beautiful gift. So we've actually had that very thing happen this year in our family, know, lost someone who had been sick and they just, you know, they didn't have that. They didn't have a plan. They didn't have the will. They didn't have, you know, all of these things. And, you know, I think what was so sad about it is I don't, in my opinion, the love was...

Sherry R. Belul (17:48)

You did.

Amanda Kaufman (18:04)

very much there. Like the love was there, but that taking care piece was missing. And there was always a reason for it to be missing. Like, it's not like it wasn't a conversation that had never ever come up before. But you know, you're right. It is an uncomfortable subject to consider our mortality if you don't have the tools, I think, to consider that.

Sherry R. Belul (18:10)

Yes!

Right.

Amanda Kaufman (18:29)

You know, that's one of the things that I've really benefited from in my own personal development and growth journey as well is, you know, I've had dark times in my 20s as well. Very, very, very dark. And through doing more of the work and being more open to different ways of thinking about things, it really was mortality motivation that led me to change my job, grow my family.

double down on marriage, you know, like all the fruit of it is just like realizing it is finite and you don't know how long you have. just you know, you're here. That's what you get. And and the thing is, it's like you will be leaving people behind eventually sometime. And you don't you don't get to you don't get to know the manner or the timing. But you can use that.

Sherry R. Belul (18:52)

Wow.

you

Yes.

Amanda Kaufman (19:20)

that activation, presence now, I think this book is really, really, important. And I love how you're how you're packaging it as well, because I think that's another reason that people don't want to do this. This planning is like, I don't want to hire the lawyer and it looks like paperwork and it's all I don't understand the terminology and it's uncomfortable, you know, but I mean.

You're right. is so, so, so important and such a beautiful way to have a final expression of that love. So good. Sherry. Oh, go ahead.

Sherry R. Belul (19:52)

I just want, ⁓ sorry.

well, I just had one quick thing also is just that I, I mean, you know me and we had this conversation. It's like, what I really tried to do with this book is to be a friendly, loving companion and dare I say, make the process even joyful. You know, so I think, cause you're right. It's not a topic people are running to talk about, but it's also nice. It's like a monster under the bed. You know, once you look under there, it's not so bad.

Amanda Kaufman (20:19)

It's not so bad. And you're exactly the person to write this book. I'm like, I'm so excited. When does it come out?

Sherry R. Belul (20:20)

That's a bit.

November, right around Day of the Dead, which I love. Yeah.

Amanda Kaufman (20:28)

How special! Okay, awesome.

Well, okay, so how can people follow you so then they hear, you know, when the book details are dropping and all of that?

Sherry R. Belul (20:38)

I love that, thank you. So my company is Simply Celebrate. On most social media, it's at Simply Celebrate. And that's probably the easiest way. And I love to DM people and be in contact that way. So, yeah.

Amanda Kaufman (20:50)

Perfect,

amazing. Sherry, thank you so much for being on the show and sharing so much and all the things. Just thank you, thank you, thank you. Thank you for being you.

Sherry R. Belul (21:00)

Thank you. I love your energy. You're such a gift, Amanda. Your podcast, your your beingness is a gift. So I'm so grateful. What fun this was.

Amanda Kaufman (21:09)

I appreciate you.

Yes, I appreciate you so much. And dear listener, we're going to have all the links in the description below or with the show notes, however you happen to be experiencing the show. And look, if this hit a vibe for you, if it like if you made it all the way to the end, I know you've got three friends who would love to hear this discussion. So just grab the link to the show, text it to them, DM it over and share the joy with them. And hey,

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And until next time, make sure you do what matters and we'll see you in another episode.